The Vitz Strikes Again

      Have you ever found yourself praying or maybe just hoping for epic things to happen as you embark on your backpacking excursion across Europe, that all too long car ride, or a weekend camping trip? I'll be honest, I use to wish for such things but having lived in Nairobi for over 6 months...there is no need to pray and/or wish for such things. They just happen.
 
     What I'm about to tell you really does feel like a bad joke, in many ways. Nonetheless, we had a great time even if it didn't go quite according to "the plan."

     Jonathan and I haven't had the opportunity to get outside of Nairobi as much as we'd like since moving here in early February 2012. So, we regularly have conversations with friends scheming some epic adventurous weekends and it just so happened that it actually worked! No more were we just going to drive out to a national park simply to hike but this time it was going to be a hiking/camping weekend. Our plan: drive to Mount Longonot at 6am Saturday to meet up with a group training for Kilimanjaro, hike, drive to Hell's Gate National Park where we'd spend the night and explore/hike til mid-Sunday. Kelsi, Matt (interns at IJM), Jonathan and myself were psyched as we (I mean, me) had prepared delicious food and had borrowed enough of our friends' equipment to be legit as we camped in Kenya. Suffice it to say, we were finally getting our "outdoor-sy" fix since moving to Africa.

     None of us has realized that the Olympics opening ceremony was commencing at 11pm on Friday night. So, what did we as responsible adults do? We stayed up til 1am with a group of friends (we throw parties for everything) and then snagged 2hrs of sleep before we needed to get up and pack "the vitz" (think of a wind up toy car..that's what we drive). Let's just say that despite the awesomeness of the Olympics, morning came all too early for us. Somehow I managed to grab a shower before running out the door to pick up Matt and Kelsi. We were running a little behind schedule but overall it was a smooth process of stuffing everything in the car including ourselves. We had been driving for about half an hour when I began telling Kelsi how great the car has been running the last month, "yeah, we actually haven't had to fix anything this month...it should be good!" Just about that time Jonathan began to slow down as a semi stalled out, as we were slowing down, though, the vitz began to shake--"um, I don't think we're going anywhere." The vitz did a little wiggle and then stopped (I won't explain what was said by those of us in the car at this point in time). So, picture this: it's dark outside, we're on the side of a high way with all of our stuff, and Jonathan and Matt get out to "figure it out." Ridiculous. After some praying and beating the car, it started working and we set off again. By 645-7am we were approaching the Great Rift Valley overlook and as we were "woooing and ahhhing" the vitz did another little dance and then pooped out. Thankfully, we had pulled off due to some small bladders that were present in the car. In true Kenyan fashion, we had a few Kenyan men approach us, "what is wrong? your car no work?" Yup. Solution: phone a friend who happens to be a mechanic and have him come jiggle some wires and diagnose it as a "computer problem." After about 40mins of this crazy making, we were off again praying the Vitz would make it to Longonot, which was only about 35ishmins away...."Jesus.....I just want to climb a mountain..."
We made it and before the car could get funky on us we all bailed, paid our park fee's, and began running up the mountain to connect with our group (they were about an hour ahead of us in the hike). The hike was amazing, weather was great, and we finished 8miles of climbing in 5hrs (1.5hrs faster than our previous time) (oh, and it took us 30mins to catch the group...boom). By the time we finished, we looked like a group of grandma's and grandpa's as our legs were burning and we needed sugar (I'm convinced if I did that hike a few times a week I'd have a tooshie of steel)! After some delectable PB&J and coke, we piled into the car, said a quick prayer and were off to Hell's Gate for more adventures. We were about 200ish meters outside of the front gate on a dirt road when the Vitz did its signature dance move and completely died. I mean, there was no resurrecting that baby. I won't bore you with the details but here's the highlights of what occurred via visual aid...

 

While we waited for the mechanic to show up, we decided to add to our ridiculousness and cook some coffee on the side of the road. new experiences abound....

Our mechanic showed up! He diagnosed the problem as being a faulty fuel pump. Solution? Siphon gas out of it via HIS MOUTH. See that cup the Marshall is holding? That's the gas that was in our mechanic's mouth....SICK

In some ways, I wish the story ended after all of this crazy making but no....it gets better. Fast forward to when we were all bundled up in our 4 person tent (thanks Karis and Steve!), had been sleeping for about 3hrs when it began to pour (we went to bed at 830pm out of boredom and exhaustion). At this point, I had woken up with crazy pain in my back from the day's adventures compounded with the freakishly hard African soil. As I laid there, listening to the rain and praying that I wouldn't have to tell stories of the time our tent got flooded I heard something. Heavy breathing. Lots.of.breathing. Listen, it wasn't coming from Matt who was, indeed, snoring but I heard something breathing outside my tent (my head was in front of the tent door). It was inches away from my head when I heard something else breathing on the other side of Jonathan. My thought pattern: "I have a flashlight, some shoes, and wicked skills. I can take this....!!!!." (you really think I can re-tell verbatim what was going through my brain at 1130 at night? Seriously...) In all honestly, though, I began to sweat, heart was pounding, and I think I may have tinkled on myself a little. So, what did I do? "Jonathan, Jonathan...." "Oh, hey, baby." "Stop it, there's something outside. I can hear it..." He tried convincing me it was Matt's snoring and just about that time he stopped talking...I looked over to my right and I saw a big shadow of something move. "JONATHAN" "I know, i see it!" (this was all in whispers, of course). At this point Kelsi had woken up and then subsequently woke Matt up to "do something!" Matt peered out through the peep hole and a bunch of water came crashing down and Matt practically jumped out of his sleeping bag because he scared himself. Hilarious. Jonathan put on his shoes and ran outside in his underwear determined to "do something." Matt had scared whatever it was all away and we eventually got back to sleep. It was determined the next morning, via poop turds, that it was gazelle's and large antelope that were munching on our patch of grass. I don't care what it was. In my mind, there were huge zebra's who were mocking us. Either way, we live to tell the tale.

     Our tow guy eventually picked us up and hauled us and The Vitz back to Nairobi. We finished the weekend off with good friends, the Olympics, and delicious Ethiopian food. After everything ended and we smelt like something fierce, we walked into our apartment ready for a hot shower. Instead, we walked into an apartment that had no electricity and was one of 3 units that didn't have it while everyone else in the complex did. "What are you trying to teach us, God?" I heard Jonathan say. I don't know what was going on with the celestial orbit that weekend but we did get a hot shower in a unit that was being renovated. We did get to hike and we did get to camp. Just not in the way that any of us had hoped.

We're already scheming our next weekend away but this time...the Vitz is staying home.



Until the next adventure,
--the crazy white kenyan's